Men of tomorrow

Men of tomorrow

I recently attended a baby shower for some friends of ours that are living in London yet here on holiday before their baby arrives this July. Instead of games they had an open forum where parents at all stages of life could share how they would finish these two sentences:

“I’m so glad I did ____ as a parent”

&

“I wish I had _____ as a parent”

It got me thinking as to what sage advice I would give to a new mom, only three years into parenting myself. Since I can never pick just one word of advice here’s my list of top tips for new parents:

  1. Don’t compare – your parenting, your child or even your recovery. Nothing good ever came from comparing yourself or your kid to someone else. So what if that mom always seems to have perfect patience with her child while you are ripping your hair out. People put their best face forward when in front of others. She has her bad days too you can be sure.
  2. Don’t Google! – your baby gets the sniffles and you search for remedies. Pretty soon you think he may have whooping-cough and you’re crying at the video testimonial you just saw with a parent who lost their child to what she thought was a simple cold (personal story!). If you need some advice or tips call your own mom or a friend. If it’s more serious, then bypass the internet and just call your pediatrician.
  3. Get support – join a local moms group, women’s bible study or parenting ed class. You will NEED support both physically and emotionally your first year as a parent. Finding those close mom friends whom you can vent, cry, and have playdates with will keep you sane.
  4. Find a mentor - this goes along with support but having an older wiser mom to share their insight and tips on what worked for them is so helpful. Plus it will help put things in perspective that this is just a short time in your life.
  5. Date your husband - your marriage will outlast the time your kids live with you (at least we hope!). So don’t forget to make the time to connect with your husband. Find a sitter and go on dates even if it’s just for an hour at a coffee shop.
  6. Give yourself grace – the dishes are piling up, you still can’t fit into your size 8 jeans, and the kids are eating cereal for dinner (again!). WHO CARES! Don’t give into the mom guilt! You are a GREAT mom, cut your self some slack. Just remember you are investing in a little human soul. One who could care less about dirty kitchens, thinks you are the most beautiful woman in the world and is thrilled with cereal.

If there were no mothers no one would exist! It’s a tough job and not one family is the same. That’s what makes all of our parenting styles so unique!

So how would you finish the sentence, “I’m so glad I did _____ as a parent”?

4 Responses to Top parenting tips for new moms: “I’m so glad I did____ as a mom”

  1. Ben says:

    These all sound like sound tips. I don’t think I will be dating my husband though give I’m a guy. But all you ladies out there date away. I have good news for all the parents out there my book The Adventures of Kid Humpty Dumpty is now available on kindle making it even easier for you to have some quality time with your kids and they will be learning (shhhh don’t tell them) Thank you, Your Friend Ben Boyd

  2. Brooke says:

    Start every morning with a load of laundry and do that load through completion sometime throughout the day (including putting it away). As a mom of three, laundry is a continuous battle but a load a day makes not only the piles smaller but your sense of accomplishment bigger.
    Try not to leave any dishes in the sink before you go to bed. For me, there’s nothing worse than starting the day cleaning up the past.
    Take a shower, ALONE. Even if it is a quick 5 minutes while Mr. TV is babysitting two and baby is exercising his lungs, you need a minute to breathe, alone. Regroup, get clean and start over. This time alone can give you some real perspective.
    Make an accomplishment journal that you keep by your bed. Before you go to sleep, instead of listing your to-dos for the next day ( or in addition) write a list of things you accomplished throughout the day. Somedays you will be amazed :)
    Lastly, to reiterate your point, Kate, friends are your support group and can literally get you through anything. The caveat? Most of the time, they need to be mommies too. Find some mommy friends and count on them, cry to them, bounce things off them and trust that they feel JUST LIKE YOU, most days.

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: