As I write this, we have one 1st birthday party under our belts, and we’re preparing to travel for our second. As I shared in my last post, we will be reuniting with our daughter’s birth family to celebrate her first year. Though we’ve stayed in touch all year via text and Facebook, this will be the first time we actually meet since we left with our daughter when she was just 1 week old. I’ve known for a year that we’d be doing this, but now that it’s here, I’m nervous. About what exactly, I’m not sure.
I suppose the feeling comes mostly from not knowing what to expect. Will this first reunion be awkward? Will seeing us with our daughter reaffirm their decision to make us her family or cause concern in some way? Will saying goodbye for the second time, though different, be just as hard as the first?
Then, I think about our first meeting. The number of unknowns was far greater, as was the risk of a potentially devastating experience. It turned out to be the most amazing experience of my life. Remembering that goes a long way to soothe the swirling in my stomach.
And for all the worrisome unknowns, I can keep coming back to the certainties. We are reuniting to celebrate our daughter’s first great milestone – to celebrate love and family. That’s certain. This experience will be completely different from our first meeting, but I have no doubt it will be tremendously special, nerves aside. My great hope is that, above all, it really feels like we’re with family – which means lots of hugs, laughter and love- and that it won’t be perfect. After all, what big family gathering goes without an awkward or difficult moment or two?
And when it comes down to it, this reunion isn’t about me at all. Our daughter is sure to be the star of the show!
Photos courtesy of Sandra Haugo of PF’s Photography.