If being a parent has taught me anything it would have to be compassion. Compassion for children, compassion for my husband and compassion for other moms. Before I had my first child I would hear mom horror stories of how their child sprayed baby powder all over the bedroom or pulled off their diaper and smeared poop on the walls. “How could this happen!?” I wondered to myself. Aren’t these moms paying attention? After I had my first child I swore those things would never happen to me. I will admit I was a bit ‘judgey’ in my early parenting years. These stories HAD to have been exaggerated, right?
Let me share three things I never thought would happen that have happened:
- Little Man was about 9 months and getting very wriggly on the diaper changing station. He was especially stinky one afternoon so I laid him up there for a change. His diaper was undone and I was holding his feet with one hand while grabbing a wipe with the other. Before I knew what happened he reached down, grabbed the edge of his diaper, and pulled it out from under him flinging it around like a flag. Poop flew into the air and before I could even scream he had flung the soiled diaper against the wall. I watched in horror as it slid down the back of the diaper changing station and onto the carpet leaving a trail of brown poop in its wake. I don’t even remember what I did next. I just couldn’t believe that it had happened! It’s not like this happened while in his crib or while I wasn’t paying attention. I was right there and STILL couldn’t do anything to stop it! I now have a poop story!
- Fast forward to 20 months. We were having a dinner party that evening and I was trying to keep Little Man occupied until my husband got home from work. We were in the back yard and I was filling the dogs’ water bowl. Little Man came walking up to me rubbing his hand on his head. My first thought was that he had bumped his head, but upon further inspection I saw his entire hand was covered with cactus needles! And not just any cactus needles, the fuzzy flesh colored kind that are so small and thin they are almost impossible to see and even more impossible to get out. He had found the ONE small cactus we have in our yard, which he had never paid attention to before, and grabbed it. I immediately freaked, which caused him to freak, and ran inside. He sat crying on the kitchen counter with me trying to tweeze out as many needles as I could grab while simultaneously googling tips on how to get cactus needles out of skin. Thankfully our dinner guests were very understanding and provided a great distraction for Little Man for the rest of the evening.
For those of you interested the best option was soaking his hand in warm water for 30 minutes and then using duct tape over his fingers to try and pull out the remaining needles.
- The last thing I swore I would never let happen happened just after Little Man turned two. It was a Saturday morning and my husband and I were sitting in the living room watching a cartoon. You would think this cartoon would have been for Little Man and you would be wrong. It was my husband’s cartoon (he’s a bit of a Batman fan). Little Man was sitting on the floor drawing in his coloring book. I began to get engrossed in the show and the next time I look over Little Man has a bright red crayon in his hand and is drawing huge circles on the wall. Both my husband and I scream, “NO!!!!!” which again was not the best response. We scared him so bad that he began crying inconsolably and I, yet again, began googling ways to get crayon off of flat paint.
So what mom ‘horror’ stories do you have to share? I promise I won’t judge. : )