At the moment, I feel like my girls have a healthy attachment to me (they want me, then they don’t, then they do, then they don’t). I guess the title of this post should actually be: Are my kids getting too attached TO EACH OTHER?

My girls are 17 months apart (technically, they’re actually about 16.75 months apart). As a ‘big sister’ myself, I’ve had an amazing relationship with my little sister (with all the normal ups-and-downs that sisters have growing up). Because my sister is my best friend (she ties with my mom), I’ve always been adamant about fostering a fantastic relationship between my two girls… but I’ve also had an unwarranted and deep-rooted fear that they’re too close in age to actually grow up being true “friends.” Will they compete with each other? Will they steal each others’ boyfriends later on? And don’t get me started about the screaming matches I’m expecting to happen regarding who’s wearing whose jeans…

So in an effort to combat this head-on, I’ve made it a point to always be a ‘team’ together since the little one was born over a year ago. “My girls!” (I shout at them in their matching outfits.) “We’re such a good team!” I sound like a cheerleader trying to earn and validate her spot on the varsity squad. They play together, they nap at the same time, they eat together, they have the same snacks, I take them both with me to do errands, I wrap them both up like infants (side by side on the floor, like burritos) just to have a group giggle… we are a TEAM. Good for me!, I used to think… my girls are gonna be best friends. I’m so smart. 

Yes, those blanket are identical.

Yes, those blanket are identical.

Except now, I think I might be really stupid. I’ve taken it too far. I’m noticing that if one of them is separated from the other, things get a bit antsy. Take my almost-3 year old’s recent dance recital: The one we didn’t go onstage to dance in because little sister was not going out onstage with her. Honestly, I don’t know if that was the actual reason my older gal threw a fit against performing that week (after a year of not having any issues in dance class) or if she was just freaked out by the bright lights, but she did keep mentioning how she wanted to be with her sissy. Hm. And when I sometimes take one-on-one time with my older girl to have some fun, she starts off having a good time but then mentions that we should go home to be with little sister. Double hmm. (Maybe I’m just boring compared to little sister?) It’s creeping to the point where it’s almost easier for me to take both of them places (which I usually do anyways) rather than carve out one-on-one time and see them ‘search’ for each other in the empty carseat. (The ‘Aren’t you forgetting someone?’ looks and questions kill me.)

Is this a phase? Does this happen with kiddos born close together… do they get really attached to each other, (like twins)? Maybe I should count my blessings that they like each other at the moment. But if this keeps up, we’re going to have major issues when preschool starts in the fall…



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