While I was still pregnant with my third child, I thought about whether or not I was done having children. I discussed it with my husband, and continued the discussion after our son was born. We’ve always differed on our view of our complete family – he always wanted his three boys and I dreamed of four kids of no specific gender. He got his three boys.
When it came time to talk about family planning again, we took into consideration our finances, our resources, our support system, and how much time and energy we both have. We came to the conclusion that it was best to stop at three children. So my husband scheduled a consultation for his vasectomy and that’s where we left it.
I couldn’t help but feel a bit empty about the decision. People were constantly asking me when I was going to try for a little girl. I’d laugh it off, like I don’t already have my hands full, but maybe it would be nice to have a girl – or even another little boy. But we had come to decision together, and I wasn’t going to go back on it. I had mentioned that in a few years if I still felt the urge to have another child we could consider adoption.
Life is kind of funny, though. That emptiness I felt didn’t stay there for long. While I went back and forth on our agreement in my head, ultimately the end result was chosen for me. And a checkup with my OB soon confirmed by suspicions. Before my husband went in for his procedure, we had managed to get pregnant again. Not an easy task when you have a nine-month-old who still doesn’t quite sleep through the night!
In December our family of five will become a family of six. I have no idea whether we will be blessed with a fourth boy, or surprised with a girl. It doesn’t even matter to me. One thing is for sure, this will be our last child, and I am completely okay with that. I never did like odd numbers.
Are you done having kids? How did you know?